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The Washington Post’s neologism contest winners.

December 2, 2019June 5, 2026 3127

I came across this today and broke up laughing. These are seriously clever! Thanks to the Washington Post. I wasn’t aware of their neologism contest, but I am now! Read and enjoy. Pass it along.

It’s an accepted fact that all writers are crazy; even the normal ones are weird.

William Goldman

Do not place a photograph of your favorite author on your desk, especially if the author is one of the famous ones who committed suicide.

Roddy Doyle

Just don’t be boring!

Robert Liebmann

I get up in the morning, torture a typewriter until it screams, then stop.

Clarence Budington Kelland

I do not over-intellectualize the production process. I try to keep it simple: Tell the damned story.

Tom Clancy

A blank piece of paper is God’s way of telling us how hard it to be God.

Sidney Sheldon

The first chapter sells the book; the last chapter sells the next book.

Mickey Spillane

To me, movies and music go hand in hand. When I’m writing a script, one of the first things I do is find the music I’m going to play for the opening sequence.

Quentin Tarantino

Work on a computer that is disconnected from the Internet.

Zadie Smith

Anecdotes don’t make good stories. Generally, I dig down underneath them so far that the story that finally comes out is not what people thought their anecdotes were about.

Alice Munro

Reading and weeping opens the door to one’s heart, but writing and weeping opens the window to one’s soul.

M. K. Simmons

I haven’t got 10 rules that guarantee success, though I promise I’d share them if I did. The truth is that I found success by stumbling off alone in a direction most people thought was a dead end, breaking all the 1990s shibboleths about children’s books in the process.

J.K. Rowling

I have a structured songwriting process. I start with the music and try to come up with musical ideas, then the melody, then the hook, and the lyrics come last.

John Legend

Do you know what a playwright is? A playwright is someone who lets his guts hang out on the stage.

Edward Albee

A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.

G.K. Chesterton

Everybody walks past a thousand story ideas every day. The good writers are the ones who see five or six of them. Most people don’t see any.

Orson Scott Card

Substitute “damn” every time you’re inclined to write “very”; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

Mark Twain

A writer is a world trapped in a person.

Victor Hugo

If you have an idea that you genuinely think is good, don’t let some idiot talk you out of it.

Stan Lee

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.